A Picture is Worth... Part 2

So I've had a couple of discussions about this shit right here and I have also read a couple of commentaries on it as well. I just want to know what do yall think this picture is saying?

Again, we need to be critical about the images that are fed to us by people like Mr. West and Lady GaGa. These are two huge celebrities right now, we buy into their images constantly. When a star is presented to their public, they are not just presenting to us their music, they are presenting their way of thinking, their personality, their style and their mistakes. People like Kanye and Lady GaGa are influencers on our generation, pop culture, our world and our society. When we start to think about images such as this, not as what are they trying to sell us but how are they trying to sell it to us, that's when we can start to hold the images we see in the media accountable. In this image, we see a female body, that falls into what a typical acceptable body looks like in mass white culture. We also see a black man, who obviously falls into the background of this image and is used to contrast Lady GaGa's overly white body. Seemingly, she is being saved from some sort of evil. In the context of feminism, the last thing we need is another woman being saved, especially by a man. However, in the context of feminism and race, the last thing we need is a white woman being saved by a ignorant, blinded by love, man-monster, which Kanye is in this picture. This picture enforces the myth of black bodies for sacrifice of the white dream. Kanye is unimportant, Lady GaGa is the perfect, innocent, white woman.

Gay Men & Their Relationship to Womyn's Bodies

So today, while on my beloved Twiitta (read: Twitter) I started to have a conversation about the relationship between womyn and queer men. Often times, womyn get harrassed by gay men. Womyn get a constant barrage of touches, feelys, lingering looks, luring eyes, foul getsures, and snide comments from gay men. Its as if they feel that they can touch and grope any part of a woman's body with a openness and confidence that I just don't see from heterosexual men; touching of the breats, touching of the hair, giving naughty comments, etc. It seems as if gay men feel that they have a type of access that heterosexual men don't have to womyn's bodies, as if, because they are not sexually attracted to womyn, then grabbing her breasts and commenting on how sexy they are is harmless. Of course heterosexual men also feel that they have an entitlement to womyn's bodies which is evidenced in sexual violence, telling womyn what they should wear, trying to limit the sexual sovereignty of womyn, etc. However, I find it evident that there is a different type of false ownership taking place between gay and heterosexual men and womyn's bodies. Most often, gay men are more open and friendly with their touching and inappropriate comments, while heterosexual men might save the same actions for a sexual scene or mean it in the disrespectful way. Gay men usually do not have the intentions of harming or disrespecting the woman in any way when they touch, unwelcomingly. Its usually a way that they show they like the woman, in a unsexual way, albeit.

The black gay male culture is one that I have a supreme respect and interest in. In black males, we see a culture that is totally different from a lot of cultures that we see in American society. However, womyn get a constant barrage of yelling, passes, unwanted touches, etc. from random men. Womyn are constantly aware of their bodies, unlike men. From years of being subjected to the 'male gaze', womyn see their bodies as a man sees them, on display, as sexual objects. A quick trip outside turns into a fashion show because womyn are aware that they are being watched by the supreme spectators, men. Sadly, it seems, gay men also fall into this category. When a gay man feels that they can touch or make sexual-esque comments towards a woman, it makes womyn even more aware of how her body appears to men, even someone who may not be attracted to her sexually.

Many womyn safe with gay men because they feel that this is one type of man who is not interested in her sexually, but when gay men cross the limit and invite themselves into the personal space of a woman that safety is abandoned. Womyn constantly have to deal with being sexual objects for men, anyone from friends to family members probably have shown a sexual interest or gesture towards any given woman, its tiring to always been seen as a sexual object. It doesn't matter whether a gay man is sexually interested in the opposite gender or not, crossing the line is crossing the line.

West Coast Hip Hop: Part 4: Dr. Dre

Dr. Dre is largely responisble for the influential and successful careers of Eminem, Warren G, Snoop Dogg, and Lady of Rage, etc. The Chronic, Dr. Dre's debut album is highly regarded as the best produced of all time. In 2001, Dre released his follow-up to The Chronic; 2001, the album was certified 6x platinum. Both albums are seen as essential to any hip hop collection. He was a pioneer in West Coast Hip Hop and created G-Funk with his characteristic sampling of Parliament Funkadelic, and George Clinton's music and use of heavy, slow beats. " The Chronic is still the hip-hop equivalent to Stevie Wonder's Songs in the Key of Life. It's the benchmark you measure your album against if you're serious."-Kanye West

Some classic Dr. Dre joints include:

What I'm Loving Right Now

Well, techinally I've been loving Mos Def for a while now, not only is he fine and sexy (in a intellectual, take no prisoners type of way) but his most recent album, The Estatic was so good. Mos Def, in the age, when no one even watches music videos anymore, (or is that just me?) and VH1, MTV & BET haven't played videos in what seem like ages; has released two AMAZINGLY creative videos. Nowadays, all we get in videos are booty shaking and a constant flashing of feigned wealth, so its good to see some that actually focus on the artists. Big ups Mos!

MOS DEF "Supermagic" from nabil elderkin on Vimeo.

West Coast Hip Hop: Part 3: Pac Div

Pac Div (Pac like The Pack not Pac like 2pac) are from Southern California and consist of brothers, Like and Mibbs, along with longtime friend BeYoung. The name Pac Div is short for Pacific Division.

Download their Church League Champions Mixtape


Pac Div


Whiplash + Young Black Male (Real chill song with Blackstar sample)


Women Problems

Check out their offical website here.

Or check them out here.

Open Letter to Ise Lyfe

I feel so inspired. You did that to me. I’m trying to remember a time when I had this feeling, I can’t. A time separate from studying theories and really getting down to the nitty gritty of what people think and feel. Its been a long time since I’ve gotten so passionate. Its been a while since I’ve still felt so passionate after the event was over.

You said, “Knowledge is strength. Wisdom is power.” I’ve always felt that I had power. However, I know now, that this is real power. Power to get my out of my comfort zone and actually tell people how powerful the event was last night.

I love hip hop. I feel like that statement is over-used, that it doesn’t encompass my passion for the institution and the music of hip hop. The political clout and power that hip hop is unique and unmatched by any other institution, at least in my knowledge. I don’t just love to listen to it, I love to research it. I’ll spend hours on end immersed in finding out the foundation of hip hop, why it is profitable, the power that it has, its principle players, and important periods of influence.

For a while now, I’ve been trying to find a way to incorporate my two passions; feminism and hip hop. Last night and right now while writing this, I cried because I have two so conflicting passions, passions that I love with my whole life, my being, and that I trust with my future. My ultimate dream is to start, build, own a series of center that, by using hip hop, helps stop the rape of black womyn. I have been struggling to create an outline for what this would look like and how it would function. Thanks to you I can actually see a plan, I see a role model, I see hope and the fact that I can fuse two of the most conflicting identities available to human kind, feminist and hip hop head. I see there actually can be an innovative take on education, without being in the confines of a classroom. I feel we need that to breakthrough, to those who reject or don’t have access to a classroom. I had never seen anyone use hip hop to directly teach a group of people. You were saying everything that I wish I had the platform and the bravado to say. I was impassioned to be even more critical of the images that I saw across my computer and television screen and the power that those images have.

Even today, I still feel empowered, more beautiful, more confident. Thank you. Thank you for doing what you do, thank you for who you are. Thank you for your gifts to me and to the world. Thank you for caring.

A Picture is Worth...

What message do yall think this picture sends, especially from someone who is a victim/survivor of domestic violence?

In the picture she seems to be afraid, hiding from something, in a dark place, and with her clothes off. She is not in a position of strength or power in the picture, with the words Wait Your Turn plastered across. She looks like a victim. Definitely not sending a good message, combined with the fact that the world watched her go through this ordeal. But, hey, that's just my opinion.

Chriannagate

We've all heard it. No matter if you tried to escape it or ignore it, you know about it. Rihanna and Chris. Or perhaps, you're on of those people that have engaged in many situations about th subject, maybe you've learned something new from one of your conversations. Or maybe you're one of those people that are sick of hearing about it, sick of seeing television specials about it, you wish people would just stay out of it! Either way, you're probably relatively familiar with the details and if not, STOP LIVING UNDER A ROCK! Recently some new dialouge has been added to the mix. Both Rihanna and Chris Brown have done highly publicized interviews with huge news sources; MTV and 20/20. First lets take a look at Chris (now remember this is all from MY opinion): He has been wrong through this whole situation. He has handled it completely recklessly. Stupid apologies. It doesn't even seem like the situation happened that long ago, and already he his back to making moves with his career. It shows a complete lack of respect and even reverence for the situation. Its like he is not taking the time to completely assess the situation and taking the time HE needs to get the help he needs, and figure out why he did what he did. Yea, he's said a few words about domestic violence, he's donated some funds to some places/people dealing with domestic violence, but it still doesn't seem like enough. There's two sides to every story. Who doesn't know that. But that doesn't mean that both sides are right, or even valid. There is usually just two different opinions. However, more often than not, there is only ONE right side. So, yes, of course people can say she deserved it(I've actually heard that). But at the end of the day, that's wrong. She didn't deserve that treatment. The truth is, no one REALLY knows what happened that eventful night. And even though some or all of the details we have maybe true, we can not say for sure. However, with the details that we BELIEVE are true, because we've simply heard them or because we see the validity in them or because we have even taken sides; no one in their right mind(I use that term very strictly) she deserves that.

We were all shocked, to see that it happened and to see that Chris was actually capable of something like that. We saw both of them as good kids, thanks to their image.

So something that you may not have heard about the situation is that the NCFM (National Coalition for Men) have released a statement, it is a plea urging Rihanna to come forward about abuse Chris has suffered at her hands.

I get involved and talk about celebrity affairs, because, number one, I have a interest in the celebrity. However, I also believe that it is good to learn from the mistakes of others, and I think we can all agree celebrities make some of the BIGGEST mistakes known to human kind. I think we can make good come from a bad situation. At the very least, we can use this situation as a catalyst to start the conversation about domestic violence, women's role in it, and especially how these subjects look in the Black American community.

I think its important to look at the response to this situation and see how it relates to how we deal with violence as Black Americans. I have never heard such severe responses to a abuse victim as I have heard towards Rihanna. I think its also important to see how we define abuse and violence, how some of us make excuses for this behavior and blame the victim, and how we measure the importance of the particular amount of violence faced. We have to admit that this issue goes beyond just Rihanna and Chris Brown and we need to see what the background to the situation is. These are two, young black celebrities with a lot of power and yet, very minimal power. Both parties have previously stated that their mothers suffered abuse while they were married. Then we have a sexual aspect, where we have a constant barrage of black women defending Chris, perhaps because they see him as a sex symbol, and still having a chance with him, sexually. Perhaps we and the media alike, have framed the issue as having two opposing sides, instead of each person involved needing help for emotional issues. Rihanna is also seen as the enemy, not just Chris. How awful it must be to go through an example of domestic violence then to have people who should defend you, make bad comments about you and the situation.

I do believe, that in order to get a clear view of ANY situation of domestic violence, there needs to be a clear conversation between both parties and a mediator to what happened. If Rihanna also took the role of an abuser in the relationship or even on that night, she needs to admit that to herself and who ever she is working with emotionally. Each case of abuse is different, however, we do get a one-sided view of domestic violence: man hits woman. We know that women are agressors in abuse situations all the time, its threat of violence, and a stigma that emasculizes men when they come forward about abuse. If Rihanna were to come out about her abuse, it could add to that conversation. It is not ok to hit ANYONE, whether you are a man or woman hitting a man or woman. We need to start to respect a person's body and work out our emotions in other ways besides violence.

Response

Recently, on a post that I wrote about the current Alicia/Beatz scandal, follow the link to read that post and the comments on it, Dear Alicia.There was ONE particular comment that I wanted to address with an entire post. I felt, at the time that it was too much to address, there were so many ignorant assumptions and blasphemies, that I knew it would take me a while to get my thoughts together. So here I am, ready to go in on this chick. I already had some other people comment, and they did a pretty good job. Some people may wonder, why I didn't just delete the comment, however, if you read my 'side note' you will see that I don't believe in over-zealous censorship, especially when it can spark a intellectual conversation. Even though homegirl's response was just plain dumb, it also exemplifies, the racism and stupidity that is still prevalent in our society. We should use this as a point to educate her and others that think like her. She was
being honest with her thoughts; meaning that she actually believes what she wrote is true,even though she was also being cowardly too.

So with my response, even some of you who, may disagree with her response, will probably disagree with my response to her comments. I ask that you, first, try to engage in what I am writing with an open mind and also do your best to educate yourself about issues that might be foreign to you.

First, race. Race was the main point in which Anonymous(#2) decided to address. We need to understand that NO ONE, can fully comprehend race, it is too difficult a subject to decihpher. Race is a CONSTRUCTED identity. One that was INVENTED. It is not a natural concept. White European colonizers divided people up according to cranium size, and visual aspects. There is no secret that people on this earth look differently. However, who says that race means what people look like? Race in its purest definition, simply means, a group of people. A RACE of people with big feet, a RACE of obsese people, etc. Why are our minds constantly wrapped around a subject that was carelessly and recklessly invented by some of the greatest idiots of our time.

This is not to say that we should ignore that we all have some type of connection with people who look the same as us. If we look at a group of people who we have never seen before we will automatically look for fimilarity. "Oh, I'm black, so is she, yay!" We do it all the time. Also, we look for differences between ourselves and others. "I'm black, she's black, but I'm light skinned and she's dark skinned." Yes, we do that too. It all depends on the situation we're in. If we feel we are in a position of power, we will differenitiate ourselves, this is just what colonizers did, they were/are in a position of power and wanted to keep and maintain that power, by any means necessary. So, they differentiated themselves from people who they deemed were different from them. Just the same, when people feel they are NOT in a position of power, they will try to create common ground. As people who are currently NOT in a position of power, ALL minorities, we need to try to create some common ground.

As corny as it sounds, we are all the same at the most basic level. We all feel, think, etc. We need to stop trying to differentiate ourselves by visual, meaningless ways.

I cannot address the general assumptions made by the commenter, as we should all know how untrue they are. I can address, however, the foolishness of making generalized statements. In ANY way, generalized statements about ANY population are a doozy. Just like it would be dumb to say, "all black people are loud", its the same to say, "all men cheat". You don't know ALL men, you don't know ALL black people, so how can you judge or make biases on them. You don't even know a fraction of ANY population. We also need to understand that even statitics are made to be damaging to certain populations and stay in line with the status quo.

Also, it is unfair to compare one population to another. Our cultures and belief systems are most likely different and you cannot use a measuring stick for one set of people for another, your measurements won't line up.

The end.

West Coast Hip Hop: Part 2: Bone Thugs-N-Harmony

For my next installment of the West Coast Hip Hop Series, I will be profiling Bone Thugs-N-Harmony. Even though Bone Thugs hail from Glenville Ohio, they were discovered by Eazy-E and helped bring G-Funk and West Coast Hip hip to the forefront.

In 1997, the group was awarded the Grammy Award for Best Rap Performance for their song "Tha Crossroads" from their E 1999 Eternal album. They also collaborated with Eazy-E, 2Pac, Big Pun, and The Notorious B.I.G., and were the only artsit/group to collaborate with all of them while they were still alived. The group consisted of four members: Krayzie Bone, Layzie Bone, Bizzy Bone and Wish Bone. Their most famous single, Tha Crossroads, rose to #1 on the Billboard Hot 100 for 9 weeks, sold over 17 million copies worldwide, and would later win a Grammy for Best Rap Performance by a Duo or Group.


(Foe Tha Love of Money; the last video Eazy-E appeared in before his death)


(Thuggish Ruggish Bone, their first single)


(Tha Crossroads, dedicated to Eazy-E)


(If I Could Teach The World)

Dear Alicia

I used to really like you Alicia. Even though I foolishly missed out on the experience of your first album, Songs in A Minor, I have all your music from that point on. I appreciated your confidence to venture into the unknown with your music. You weren't like other singers, you had dignity, integrity and it showed in your music. You've sold millions of albums and won tons of awards with your somtimes alternative, sometimes neo-soul genre of music. I know a lot of your songs by heart, Alicia. You were a black woman that I could be proud of. As I watched you grow up musically, personally, and even fashionably; (remember those frontward braids?), I also watched you accept many awards for being the humanitarian that you were supposed to be. I said to myself, "Alicia is beautiful, inside and out." I said, "she actually cares, she knows what matters." The Alicia Keys that I admired would never be caught up in silly drama, or sing songs that could be damaging to a girl's self esteem, this Alicia was humble and educated. This Alicia was self-less and stood worlds above the people that make it harder to live in this world, you were a person that made it easy to listen to your music and not have to say "I like the music but not the person singing it". I stood up for you when other people talked shit about you. I remember when you first burst onto the music scence, it took me a minute to warm up to you but I enjoyed your braids, doo rag and jeans. You wrote your own songs and played the piano! You seemed down to earth, like a homegirl. You were a breath of fresh air from those of us tired from the same gyrating, skin baring singers we had been used to seeing. Your voice was powerful and filled with whatever emotion conveyed in the song. Your lyrics were about empowerment and staying true to yourself. I thought you were real Alicia.

Now, Alicia I find myself hating you more and more everyday. I can't see how someone who sang about Karma is now making bad karma for herself. You should have been the expert on the subject, this mistake that you have made, is a little girl's slip-up and Alicia you're supposed to be a woman. I will never understand how someone who gave all womyn everywhere hope and pride with a song like "Superwoman" can show us that someone who prided herself on being a role model can shatter images of what I good woman looks like for little girls who have no one else to look up to. I am still trying to wrap my mind around how you can help AIDS victims but yet help a man break a woman's heart. Alicia, how can you attribute to the misfortunate experience of breaking up someone's family? How can you leave a child with a broken home? And worst of all how can you show so little empahty or care about your actions and how they affect your fans and the people around you? Don't get me wrong Ms. Keys, I understand that when you're in the public eye you have to keep a persona that can sometimes be limiting. And of course, we all make mistakes. And maybe we all thought you were above making mistakes. But would it have been too much to think that you were above this? I tried to deny it at first. "Not Alicia", I said. Then I came to believe it after I saw pictures and tweets. I had put you on a pedastel that eventually proved to be too much for you to handle. I know your entitled to your privacy, but as someone who proved to a role model for millions, how can you so easily close the door on those who looked up to? I don't deny that you might be dealing with this sliently, but it sure doesn't look like it when I see pictures of you and Mr. Beats plastered on blogs, having a gay ol' time together. I also know it takes two to tango and I will even argue that Mr. Beats is more at faults than you are. He was the one in a relationship, not you. Maybe their marriage was already over, he just needed that extra push. But Alicia, why did you have to be that push? You seem to believe that you are above being the victim of a cheater's actions. Please know, that what goes around comes around, what goes up will come down, if he did it to her, its more than likely he will do it you too. I cannot tell you who to be involved with, Alicia, I just hoped that such an esteemed woman would make better, wiser choices for herself. Don't you know what you're worth Alicia? Did you sing about A Woman's Worth, but didn't have the self-esteem to know yours? I know how powerful love can be, how no matter how many times you leave, love just won't let you. I know, but please Alicia, try, try.

The Future of Hip Hop

If this is the future of hip hop, what does it look like to you?

West Coast Hip Hop

I'm from Los Angeles, California baby!! I represent it to the fullest and love it with all my heart! In accordance with this, I will be inducting a series on the subgenre of West Cost hip hop. This first post will be a general one, about West Coast hip hop and furthermore I will start to highlight specific artists that have made an long lasting and positive impact on West Coast and its music. West Coast hip hop is generally characterized was popularized by artists such as Ice Cube and Dr. Dre. Los Angeles and Bay Area, California are main hot spots of the origin and practice of West Coast hip hop. The West Coast was the fisrt area involved in hip hop to add a voice to the ghetto and the happenings there. West Coast hip hop is political too and it was also infused with guitar ridden beats, making it infused with rock musical elements. NWA's Straight Outta Compton soldifies the West Coast place in hip hop music. With such artists belonging to the area, such as Too Short, Cypress Hill, and Ice T, West Coast hip hop is a historical powerhouse. G angsta Funk or G-Funk was also originated in the West Coast. It was a dominant sound that helped put West Coast hip hop on the map. G-funk incorporates multi-layered and melodic synthesizers, slow hypnotic grooves, a deep bass, background female vocals, the extensive sampling of p-funk tunes, and a high portamento sine wave keyboard lead. There was also a slurred “lazy” way of rapping in order to clarify words and stay in rhythmic cadence. Unlike other earlier rap acts that also utilized funk samples, G-funk often utilized fewer, unaltered samples per song. G-funk often sampled Parliament of Funkadelic songs, popularized by artists like George Clinton. G-funk became the most popular subgenre of hip hop.

Series: Womyn N Hip Hop and Rap Music: Part 1: Lauryn Hill

So today my friend and I were discussing womyn and & in hip hop. Nicki Minaj, Lil Kim, Lauryn Hill, Queen Latifah, MC Lyte. Just now, I was thinking about how much some people focus on the disrespect of womyn in hip hop and the lack of womyn in hip hop that we forget about the contributions that womyn have made to hip hop in the way of artistry. We need to respect not only womyn's bodies and their place in hip hop but also their connection and effect on hip hop. Therefore, with this post, I am going to start one of the many series I have coming up: Womyn in hip hop. First up to the mic: Lauryn Hill. She's my favorite female emcee, her talent, voice, beauty, and creativity were unmatched. We need you back Lauryn!!

Lauryn's appearances on the Fugees first under-the-radar album 'Blunted on Reality'(don't you just love that title?!), was stark but decidely quiet, actually only appearing on half of the album's 18 tracks. On the Fugees follow up album, The Score, Hill had a bigger hand in what would be one of the highest selling hip hop albums, 18 million copies sole. Lauryn won two grammys with the Fugees and stood out on a number of tracks with them like 'Ready or Not' with lyrics such as "I be Nina Symone and defacated on your microphone".

However, the Lauryn we all know and loved shined even more on her debut solo album, The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill. She received 11 nominations for The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill, the first hip-hop album to do so. It won 5 of the 11, making Hill the first female artist to win that many. The album was about the education one receives after leaving school; the life learning process. This really resonated with me because growing up I learned a lot of life lessons, that later on I found out weren't lessons at all, just false-truths, that I believed in at that time, until i got older. Being that life is a continous learning process, we have to re-learn lessons that we once believed with such conviction. The album changed the way womyn, especially black womyn and womyn in hop hop were viewed. She was credited with bring hip hop into the mainstream with the album's mix of R&B and reggae, not unlike the Fugees previous albums. It was a heartfelt and honest documentation of love, lost, and desperation. Miseducation did what a lot of male artists in hip hop had not done yet and a lot of them would never do. Lauryn was one of the few females emcees in the 90s that didn't join in on the warfare against black womyn. The music of Miseducation was like a spoken word session between her and some of the most talented artists ever, such as D'Angelo, Carlos Santana, and Mary J. Blige. The album was a creative portrayal of what womyn could be and who we are, what we go through and the respect we deserve. She forced us to pay attention and take note with her soft and meaningful lyrics and unassuming smile.

Doo Wop (That Thing)

(Everything is Everything)

(The Sweetest Thing)

(Ex-Factor)

(I Gotta Find Peace of Mind)

Love you Lauryn!

Music of the Day

So simply put: I'm going to start putting up a musical selection of the day, preferably a music video but it may just be a link or a streaming song. Sometimes it may be a classic or a song that I think you should check out. Please let me know what yall want to see.

For today's Music of the Day selection:

Today's selection is a classic by Deap Prez: hip hop.

Drake, Mr. Carter, The Other Mr. Carter, and Mr. West

How many times have us hip-hop fans discussed whose the hottest emcees of all time or even the best rappers right now? Countless lists have been formulated since the beginning of hip hop to chronicle what fans should be listening to, who we should be listening to, what everyone else is listening to, who not to listen to, and who everyone isn’t listening to and shouldn’t be. Numerous publications, respected in hip hop and not, have put together lists like these for the purpose of everything from organization to duty. The lists we put together in conversations with other hip hop heads at home to the hair salons and barbershops, are all dictated by exposure. No one can know about you if there’s no label behind you pumping thousands of dollars to ensure your career and their pockets. If you want people to listen to you, make them think that a whole lot of other people are listening to you. This seemed to be the formula of success for every other emcee except The Original Mister Carter and his soon to be successor Drake. Anyone who knows the story of Jay-Z probably knows that he was one of the first people to start their own record label, in a time when labels were infamous for ripping off their clients. Whatever you think about their lyrical skills and their maybe over-rated hyper-hype no one can not sit up and take notice to the ruthless and uncanny ability to spark buzz like Jay-Z and the rapper formerly known as Aubrey Graham to the teenage-now-grown-up set. Anyone who follows hip hop would be foolish not to include Drake and Jay-Z on their hottest MC’s list. Both artists have been featured on the other’s records. But are these two really enemies? If not in real life, maybe in the ring of rappers and emcees? Or on the front line of lyricism? Or perhaps on the behalf of buzz? No rapper or emcee before or after Jay-Z is able to captivate as much buzz as his larger than life, rock star persona, except maybe Drake or maybe even the other Mister Carter, D’Wayne Michael Carter Jr. Drake along with Lil Wayne are poised to become Jay-Z’s successors whether he likes it or not and some people are more than ready for him to give up claim to the mic.

Drake on the other hand is just getting started and hip hop fans are itching for him to get started. He has yet to release his debut album and continues to garnish teasers with mixtapes. His most popular one, So Far Gone has garnered attention from Jay-Z, Kanye West, and Lil Wayne; his mentor and label boss. According to Fader.com, “On his own records, he abandons Southern double-time to push genre boundaries more like Kanye, rapping over chopped-and-filtered snatches of Coldplay, Lykke Li and Peter Bjorn & John. The differences only get starker if you compare Drake’s bio to his project-raised, tattooed and codeine-addicted mentor. Though born in Memphis, Aubrey Drake Graham was raised in Forest Hills, an affluent enclave of Toronto that is about as far in mood and geography from New Orleans as you could get without a land bridge. Before he ever considered being a rapper, Drake was a child actor, portraying athlete Jimmy Brooks on the Canadian teen drama Degrassi: The Next Generation. His father, Dennis Graham, was a drummer for Jerry Lee Lewis, and he is nephew to both legendary bassist Larry Graham and Teenie Hodges—a guitarist best known for co-writing some of Al Green’s ’70s classics who’s played with everyone from Talking Heads to Cat Power. The more you know about him, in fact, the harder it seems to know exactly who Drake is. There is something almost chameleon-like about his talent. If his appeal can’t be contained to a one-liner like “Wayne protégé,” it’s only because he invites a whole series of comparisons: to Wayne’s inventiveness, Kanye’s art-school eclecticism, Jay-Z’s braggadocio and Lloyd’s post-Kelly singsong. He has the lyrical teeth to skewer you if you mistake introspection for weakness.”

In today’s hip hop game it is almost a necessity to be from an impoverished background with experience in gunplay and cocaine. The number one reason why rap battles in the mainstream ensue are because one person lies about where they are from or their background and another person calls them out on it. The glamourization of the “hood lifestyle” is on the is a huge problem and hip hop and has people everywhere wanting to be something they are not. Just look at the example of Rick Ross who raps about cocaine and guns, and yet is a former corrections officer. However, there are two examples where this is not true. Kanye and Drake, both come from middle class families where they weren’t exposed to the harsh realities of life. “Drake does not seem particularly pressed to play down the middle class and Jewish half of his biracial upbringing and frequently mentions his mother’s central role in his life.”-Fader.com One may wonder, though, if Kanye and Drake’s limitless life, transfers to limits in their lyrics. The two are known for the boisterous lyrics in which they show their bravado. One might expect for Drake and Kanye’s lyrical content to be something for the ages. Instead we get a kind of dumbing down from their educated selves and even Lil Wayne who attended college for sometime like Kayne. One might want to tap them on their shoulder and tell them that hip hop can be educated too.

Drake is not only a rapper but also, and annoyingly a crooner on most of his hooks. He has a do-it-yourself approach to his music, his production and refreshingly, his image. Drake, Kanye, Lil Wayne and Jay-Z all fall in the overrated set. Despite that, Drake has signed one of the biggest record deals ever, signing a contract with Lil Wayne’s Young Money for over a million dollars. “That deal is the end result of what has been described as one of the biggest bidding wars the music industry has seen in ages. No one party is willing to share all the details, but Atlantic Records and Interscope’s Jimmy Iovine were certainly both in the mix, and at one point, Universal Motown president Sylvia Rhone apparently threatened Drake with legal action to prevent him from going elsewhere. In the end, he signed directly to Aspire, a company co-run by his manager (and Young Money CEO) Cortez Bryant, with major label distribution through Universal Republic. Although his Wikipedia entry and various news items list his label as Cash Money/Universal Motown, Drake is quick to say, ‘I went through Universal Republic because I don’t fuck with Motown. At all.’ The details are more than academic, since the Universal affiliation is what allows Lil Wayne and Young Money to own a piece of the project. But even though Wayne has been touted as an executive producer in previous interviews, Drake indicates that putting a YM logo on the disc is more of a nod to his mentor than a structural reality. Kanye—according to the people around Drake, anyway—is so open on his talent that he is more amped to work on Drake’s project than his own, dangling the possibility that he might step in as executive producer.”-Fader.com

All four artists can be named the four hardest working emcees in show business. Their names have been on everyone’s lips for a while now in their ever sweeping takeover of the hip hop game. “‘Forever’ may be for the album or possibly a forthcoming soundtrack, a Kanye collabo in which he and Drake bring out the best in each other, elevating their respective rap games in a way that’s only happened with Drake and Wayne on tracks like “Ransom.” It’s the kind of verse that lends real credibility to his fans’ claims that Drake is the best lyricist on the set in 2009. Despite the obvious implication, he does not seem inclined to substitute one mentor for another, preferring to develop the sound for the album himself, drawing beats from his engineer, “40” Shebib, and other members of his crew, loosely known as October’s Very Own.’-Fader.com

However, one can only glimpse into the probably friendly rivarly between all of them. The recent releases of all four were some of the most anticipated and talked about. The Carter 3 versus The Blueprint 3 versus So Far Gone and 808s and Heartbreak. Hip hop breeds competition even among friends. When you feature on someone’s track you better be sure to bring your best or risk being slaughtered on your own song. Jay-Z seems to be coming in first off the heels of his latest release. The Washington Post called him “hip-hop's undisputed alpha male”, albeit in a full out diss to his newest installment of the now completed Blueprint series. Spin says that the Blueprint 3 is posied “to create a world-historical event horizon” with its release. Nothing is more prominent about Jay-Z, not even his artistry, than his skill in exuded pride, confidence, even cockiness and conceit. Any line that you could probably quote from him is for sure expressing his dire love with himself. With his sway, his teasing to bring back Versace shades, and his incessant laziness, seem to suggest that not only does he feel he is number one but that he will always be number one. Not only does he believe he is the greatest alive, he knows that he is the greatest ever; we all know those who agree. But one must wonder if he really feels he is the best why the need to constantly behave in a way that cries so desperately that the fact needs to be proven, namely to the most famous new school to come about in a while, if not ever. On “What More Can I Say, Jay-Z says, “Add that to the fact I went plat a bunch of times. Times that by my influence on pop culutre, I supposed to be number one on everybodys list, We'll see what happens when I no longer exist, Fuck this” You got the Entertainment Weekly proclaimed JV squad Drake and Kid Cudi court the youth vote. Drake, and even though Wayne has been in the game for a while now, we never quite saw him like this with CashMoney; Wale, both who have worked and been listed as proteges of Jay, and LA mixtape kings, Nipsey Hussle and Jay Rock. Is it because he is feeling at least slightly threatened? One would think it weird if he weren’t. Why? Jay is living off money it would take at least a thousand regular people to use in two lifetimes. The crown? Me think so. If a talent is able to surpass Jay what would become of him? He’s supposedly tried so many times to quit the game and as most musicians can relate to, it is his livelihood. And he wouldn’t dare think of giving up his career, the one that saved him from death or a life sentence without a fitting escape. He respects hip hop too much, or at least he says he does. But one has to wonder how can he respect it, when he has obviously gotten bored doing it. He seems to be secretly, embarrasingly, and probably shyly trying to compete with his earlier works or at least before 2006’s Kingdom Come. “There's never been a nigga this good for this long, This hood, Or this pop” The problem is he doesn’t want anyone to know it, so he remains complacent and cocky. Never letting his faithful fans get a glimpse of his vulnerabilities. If he only knew, it would bring us closer and give him what he’s been waiting for; a epic exit from the game. “On The Blueprint 3, Jay aims to rectify that by reconciling his two divergent worlds: the rode-hard history of the Brooklyn housing projects he came up in, and the yachting-
off-the-Amalfi-Coast-with-Gwyneth celebrity Narnia he inhabits today. Even if it lacks the raw power of his earlier work, the album succeeds at its larger goal — reaching maximum commercial blast radius while maintaining its street bona fides.” -EW

These days, you can’t read an article without his age being mentioned and it serves as a reminder to no one more than Jay-Z himself. No matter how much I may be tired of his assertions of being “the new Sinatra”, hip hop doesn’t tire of this recycled but never old formula from Jay. Perhaps ABCNews said it best, “Perhaps that's what rap needs to reinvigorate itself — someone to pull the genre out of its money-clothes-cars-and-girls sinkhole.” He tried to be the savior but he’s one of the reasons it needs saving. One must pause and wonder if the laziness was fueled by this obligatory last album owed to Def Jam. One would also wonder if he would sacrifice his artist integrity like that, but either way he’s and always will be wildly successful. “
After been beat out by his known worshipper, Lil Wayne for the Grammy of Best Rap Album, after performing with him, the complexity of hip hop’s biggest star is sometimes confusing. Its as if he features in their songs to soothe his ego. "Wayne's scorching, I’ll applaud him, if he keeps going, i'll pass the torch to him"
In the December 2006 issue of Complex Magazine, Lil Wayne stated “‘I'm better than [Jay-Z]... I'm 24 years old. (...) I'm 13 years deep with five albums and 10 million records sold, I don't like what he's saying about how he had to come back because hip hop's dead and we need him... What the fuck do you mean? If anything it's reborn, so he's probably having a problem with that. You left on a good note, and all of the artists were saying, 'Yo, this is Jay's house. He's the best.' Now he comes back and still thinks it's his house... It's not your house anymore, and I'm better than you"[85]. On the track "Watch What You Say to Me" Jay-Z makes an attack on Lil Wayne, rapping, "I hear you baiting me lately / I've been doing my best just to stay hater free / Still watch what you say to me / Sooner or later I take you up on your offering / Put you all in your place / Like I'm replacing your father / You're talking to the author / The architect of the Blueprint/ My DNA in your music / Motherfucker, you stupid? Watch what you say to me.". Eventually, the beef was resolved between them, and the two of them recorded tracks together like "Hello Brooklyn 2.0," "Mr. Carter," and "Swagga Like Us.’”

Allmusic's Steve Huey describes Jay-Z as a "a street hustler from the projects who rapped about what he knew—and he was very, very good at it...detailing his experiences on the streets with disarming honesty".[17] Multiple aspects of this lifestyle are explored: "Can't Knock the Hustle" details Jay-Z's hustling talent, "Cashmere Thoughts" and "Dead Presidents II" explain his financial goals and other tracks like "D'evils" and "Regrets" detail how hustling negatively affects the mind. Huey summarizes the album's subject matter saying: “He's cocky bordering on arrogant, but playful and witty, and exudes an effortless, unaffected cool throughout. And even if he's rapping about rising to the top instead of being there, his material obsessions are already apparent [...] the album's defining cut might [...] be the brief "22 Two's," which not only demonstrates Jay-Z's extraordinary talent as a pure freestyle rapper, but also preaches a subtle message through its club hostess: Bad behavior gets in the way of making money. Perhaps that's why Jay-Z waxes reflective, not enthusiastic, about the darker side of the streets.[17]”

Control

Once upon a time, I was young and dumb. I used to believe that "control" could be shared by both parties in a relationship. Relationship; meaning either a committed relationship or two people building to a committed relationship or really any type of connection you have with someone who you're attracted to. There is always one person that has more control than the other person. Now, in a relationship both parties should always be making sacrifices, equal sacrifices. It takes sacrifice to build a relationship with two very different people. However, there are a lot of ways to maintain control of the "relationship" no matter where it is headed. They are as follows:

1. Home. Court. Advantage.: The first mistake that one can make when establishing a "sex buddy" relationship with someone that can make you lose control of the situation is losing home court advantage. You should ALWAYS opt to have your partner at your house. There's nothing better than making him/her leave after yall get threw doing yall business. Making her/him use all their gas to get there instead of you is just the icing on the cake. You don't want to have to travel over there, and have him/her make the decision whether to take you home or let you spend the night. If you're the one with the base covered, there is no need to make this decision, make him/her leave! You don't want anyone getting to comfortable in your bed, sloberring and carrying on. You don't her/him to accidentally leave a pair of underwear of maybe a toothbrush over there. That might mess up your game for your next sexscapade with someone else. When you let someone linger at your apartment don't be surprised if they start getting attached or try to move your sex relationship into a real relationship.

2. In the context of building to a committed relationship, it is most important to keep control of the journey. Now, controlling this type of situation is a little more tricky than just a "sex buddy" situation. The point is not to GAIN CONTROL but just not to let your control be less than your hopefully soon to be significant other. When establishing a relationship both parties should try to be as equal as possible. For example, in the situation of hit ups; both parties should be hitting each other in about an equal amount. If he/she starts to lag in the hitting up, whether it be a text, a phone call, or a invite to a date, first you should also stop contacting him/her, then talk to the person about it. Tell him/her you're upset because there hasn't been enought communication as of lately. You have to talk about it with the person, it is not enough to just stop hitting the person up, he/she can take that to mean anything and you may put the relationship in jeopardy. As far as, bringing up problems in the situation when they arise, talk about them! Don't make the other person always be the one to bring up what's necessary. If you do let that happen, that person will always have control of the situation, and ultimately have the fate of the relationship in his/her hand. That goes for really any type of interaction, telling him/her how you feel about him/her, etc.

Control is important to maintain to keep your grounding on the relationship and to make sure its going the way you want and need it to. If you lose control to another person you run the risk of getting your feelings hurt as well as wasting your time.

2pac

Today is the 13th anniversary of the greatest emcee(!) ever, 2pac's death. I hate using the word anniversary to describe something sad, its such a happy word. I love 2pac and his music will live on forever. He was an incredible, insightful talent, who can never be touched lyrically or stylistically. We love you.

My favorite pac song:



My mommy's favorite:



How Do You Want It:

Liner Notes Installment #1: Keyshia Cole: The Way It Is

I really miss this Keyshia. The raw, hard hitting Keyshia.

2. I Changed My Mind-Contains a sample 'Get Out Of My Life, Women' Performed by Solomon Burke

3. Love, I Thought You Had My Back-Contains Elements of "Love Jones"

7. You've Changed-Contains Elements of "Sounds Like A Love Song" Bobby Glenn

8. We Could Be-Contains replay instruments element from big fish audio CD

12. Never featuring Eve-Contains Sampled portions of: "Never too Much" by Luther Vandross

What Are You Intentions With me?

If you're a person who is dating right now, these six words are ones that you should know, memorize and not be afraid and be prepared to use frequently! Men and womyn need to start getting real about where they are going with their situation. Listen closely: When a person tries to talk to you, no matter where you are, what you're doing, what you're looking like, he or she has one or more of these three intentions: 1. To create a sex buddy relationship with you, 2. Give you money, or use you for your money, and/or number 3: Create a real, meaningful relationship with you. Ladies and gentlemen, that is all there is! No more, no less! When a man or woman approaches you, they have some type of intentions in his/her mind. No one walks up to a person solely for friendship, or "getting to know you". Don't be afraid to ask this question. Do it on the spot, I promise it will save a lot of time and wasted energy. Say for instance, you're looking for a relationship and when you ask this question homegirl or homedude say he's just looking for someone to kick it with, then you know that's not for you and you don't even have to waste time running down your cell phone battery to store his or her number. Now not everyone is honest about their intentions even when you ask them upfront. For example, a conversation might go like this: Man: "Hey wassup Ma, can I get your number?"; Woman: "Well first I want to know what you're intentions are with me?"; Man(obviously taken aback by your question and shy about his REAL intentions): well I just want to get to know you and we can see where it goes from there, you know I like your style, I think you're cute; This is what your reponse should sound like: Woman: Well what is your purpose in getting to know me? You must have some type of intention, you came over here to talk to me. If he doesn't know what he wants, then tell him to find out and come back. Some people may be turned off by your response but others will know they can't come wat you with no bullshit and respect your confindence and realness and I promise they will not try that again!

Sometimes when someone wants something from you, especially sex, he/she is afraid to say it. They might feel like this is a turn off for the person on the receiving end of the request. However, come on, this is 2009! People will appreciate it a LOT more if others were just upfront about their's and stopped hiding behing "game". I am sure that no matter how shady, nasty, or great your proposal there are people out there that will accept or deny it. People do not need to be gamed up anymore! If you want sex and sex only, let it be known! Stop wasting your and his/her time!

Liner Notes

I've found out that I am the type of person that gets creative at night. You know, when you're bored and instead of constantly checking your Facebook over and over, you actually discover new music, books, people, etc. Well during the day I do Facebook and at night I find out stuff like I wish I had the liner notes to every album ever made. If you don't know liner notes are the little book that comes in the front side of a CD. The liner notes are a vital part of enjoying the music being played into your ears. Were it not for liner notes I might have never discovered that the same person who sings the hook to Mos Def's Roses is the same person that is featured of Erykah Badu's Master Teacher; Ms. Georgia Anne Muldrow. Chances are the song the you are listening to contains a sample from another song from a previous generation. So I took to Twitter to ask my loyal followers to point me in the direction of a website that has an vast array of liner notes. I received no response. Therefore, I am taking on the task of creating one myself. As of right now, I do not have the resources to create one to the extent that I would like to, however, I will start small with the liner notes that I still possess that have not been thrown away when I was a young and dumb non-music fanatic. Hopefully, I will be able to expand it with time. If you would like to help out, please comment and I will give you an address to which you can donate your liner notes.

Now, I am trying to decipher the important parts of the liner notes. What do yall think that I should include? What I usually like to look at is samples, featured artists that are not obviously listed, lyrics, and any stories included. I don't really care who wrote the song or who produced it, that isn't important to me.

What I want people to realize is that all music is connected. Your favorite emcee has probably sampled a hard rock song for one of his/her biggest hits, if you know what the song sampled was you'll probably discover a whole new genre of music. I have vowed to stop buying mp3's and actually buy the CD so that I can build my collection of liner notes for our viewing and reading pleasure. And yes, I buy music!

First installment of liner notes coming soon!

Pussy Ain't No Prize! No, Really, Its Not.

Fellas this post is for you. Ever had a lady try to withhold sex from you? Maybe you said something you shouldn't have said, like, "Why are you wearing that?" or "Comb your hair!" Or maybe you did something that you shouldn't have done, like stayed out to the wee hours of the morning, got a call from your ex-girlfriend, or didn't call your girl back like you said you would. Any one of these situations can make a woman so mad that she doesn't want to give you what some see as a prize or reward. She is probably thinking something to the effect of "why reward bad behavior?". You might even walk on egg shells so that you may have your due at the end of the day. But ladies, I'm going to have to side with my men for a second. First, I said it once and I'll say it again: Ladies' sex drives are underrated; men, please believe that your lady of the night or girlfriend wants to have sex as much as you do. Who wants to be sleep because they are so-called "punishing" their man when they could be having sweet hot sex on those new sheets yall just bought from Bed, Bath, and Beyond? Girl, you ain't just withholding sex from him, you withholding it from yourself! Get real! And if you're really mad, just try some angry sex. Or just put your anger aside and put out. You can begin the madness right after, or hell, the sex might even squash the beef. Sometimes its ok just to let shit go.

Let's take Joe Budden and his girlfriend Tahiry for example:

Now Tahiry seems like a down ass chick. She says "I came home and I wanted to sit on my man." She doesn't seem like a prude, however, she had expectations that weren't met. Therefore, her reasoning is; my expectations weren't met and yours won't be met either. I do have to point out, though, that I take DEEP offense with Joe Budden's notion that Tahiry has an obligation to fulfill his sexual needs. No woman or man has an OBLIGATION to have sex with their significant other just because he or she wants to have sex. If you say no, end of story. Yall can talk about why you said no later. Coercion or forcing your man or woman to have sex is NOT the answer. That's called rape. Did you know that it only recently became illegal for a man to rape/force his wife to have sex? The notion was that a wife is un-rapeable by her husband because she is essentially his property and has an OBLIGATION to have sex with him when he so deems necessary. Womyn are not sex machines and just as men sometimes don't feel like having sex, we are the same way. Also, just like men like to have sex a lot, so do womyn; just at the right times.

Ok, so let's look at the part of the video, where the object of pussy being a prize comes up. Now, right here, I have to side with Joe. "Pussy ain't no prize!" I concur. Come on, lesbihonesstt. We all like sex. If pussy is a prize, so is dick. If pussy ain't a prize, then neither is dick. And I for one, do believe that it is.

We have to get rid of this sexist notion that womyn "give it up" and men "take it". If I'm giving something up when I am having sex, then so are you! We are doing the same act, with each other! Men are not the hypersexual toads that society makes them out to be and should be able to deny or not want sex without being labeled gay or the like. Nobody says a woman is gay when she tells her boyfriend no. Now, if your man or woman is constantly not in the mood for sex without any apparent reason, then yall should talk about it and see what the problem is. Maybe its a medical issue.

Ok, so back to the video. I definitely have to give Tahiry her props. She doesn't let Mr. Budden get away with his bullshit. First, she tells him that contrary to his belief, she does not have an obligation to engage in sex with Joe and then she sets him straight when he tries to blame her if he decides to go out and cheat and have sex with someone else. Ladies!, it is never you fault when a man decides to do something stupid. Yes, you may not be having sex with him, but he doesn't have the right to cheat; he does however have the right to break up with you. Nor is it your fault if he lies to you. He might say you don't make it easy for him, or that you can't handle the truth, but the reality of the situation is that he probably has a lot of growing up to do when it comes to relationships. A man must takes responsibility for his own actions and stop saying that his girl drove him to it. Read a little bit more about the subject here (make sure you read the comments on this post.)

So, while they are signing off. Joe says something that only a misogynist rapist would say. "You know how this goes, you'll be sleep, and you'll wake up with something inside you." Yea, I can't even explain what's wrong with that statement or if he actually does it, that situation. I am convinced homeboy is capable of abuse; seeing as that so-called joke, wasn't even funny.

Ok, so I just want to touch on one last aspect before I sign out. This notion that men need to work and wait for sex needs to be thrown out the window, also. As a woman when you want sex from a man do you expect for him to make you wait and WORK for it? I think not. If you don't want to wait and work then why the hell should he? It needs to be equal. If to wait, is something that yall decide together because yall are trying to build to a relationship, then ok. But don't make it so he's jumping through hoops to get to you and that monkey, when you ain't done shit to get his prize. :) Just like womyn have pussy power, men have penis power too.

So how about it yall? Ever withheld sex from your man or woman? Your man ever try to blame your for his actions? Ever had sex withheld from you? Ever have a man or woman cheat on you because yall wasn't having sex? Tell me all about it, I want to hear!

PS: Please remember that we all have body sovereignty and this essay is not in opposition to that. Nor is it in opposition to satisfying youself sexually. You can do with your body what you please, but we as womyn need to stop using our bodies to leverage for something that has nothing to do with our bodies. We allow our bodies to be looked at as a commodity instead of a acting force. We cannot continue to commodify sex, that is part of the problem now, when our bodies are viewed as something to be bartered, bargained for and bought, we give into the notion that we are the sexual gatekeepers and men are princes waiting to devour. If you have a problem with your significant other, talk about it! And if that doesn't work take other action that doesn't deny your sexual needs.

And Every Night Around This Time We Make Love Songs...

That's the name of one of my favorite songs by The Dream aka Terius Nash, called er, you guessed it, Love Songs! In the song, Mr. Nash, talks about how he and his significant other of the night are making muuusic. What I want to know is how you and your lady/man of the night get down? Music or none? Do you need the beats of R&B Thug by R.Kelly to drown out the sometimes awkward sounds of squeaking bodies against each other? Or it the sound of the breathy moans enough to get you by? Ever listen to song with some hella contradictory shit? For example, ever listen to The Greatest Sex by R.Kelly, knowing that its totally wrong, because this is the farr from great sex?? Ever wish you had music? If you get down with music what are some of your favorite hits to listen to? Got any special cuts? Do you use the same shit every time you get down? Or do you change it up with every dip in the nasty nasty?? Or do the songs change depending on whether its a jump-off or a real relationship you got with the other person? Let me know! I want to hear what yall think!

So, in the spirit of sex music, let me tell yall a little story. So the first REAL time I had sex my then-boo asked me to pick the song, he got mad because I kept putting on hip-hop songs. Hey!, my love runs deep! I was putting on songs such as Hey Ma by Cam'ron and Juelz Santana and Money Make Me Come by Ricky Ross the Boss then he snatched away the iPod and turned on some wack R&Blues, at that! Some omarionjamiefoxxbullshit. I don't know about yall, but I'm not a fan of too many male R&B artists, but I can definitely fuck with some Trey Songz, The (aforementioned) Dream (no pun intended). It figures he had none. Like who doesn't have these two in their iPod selection?? They are a must if you like to get it on to music, man! Well, it goes without saying that I am such a huge hip-hop head that I even want to have sex to it, and he and others I told about it make me think it was weird, but I came to realize (hey!) you like what you like! Anyway, anything that I wanted to get down to would have been wayy better than getting it in to the same wack shit every time. I did end up making a playlist for us, that was still in line with his style of sexing. It had some This Song by LeToya and Make Love by Keri Hilson. Too bad I never got to try any of it, shit popped off before I had a chance to.

And if you still think I'm weird, here's a post at Parlour Mag about good hip-hop songs to do the do to.

Some of my favorite "songs that get the skins" follow:

Adina Howard-Freak Like Me

Adina Howard-Nasty Grind

Chris Brown-Take You Down

Ludacris-Splash Waterfalls

The Dream-Falsetto

Usher feat Young Jeezy-Love in the Club

Bust The Windows Out Your Car V.S. ???

So today I was listening to my ipod on shuffle and a song came up that reminded me of another song; Blu Cantrell's Hit Em Up. Yall know yall remember that song! In it Blu talks about the revenge she gets after she catches her man scheming. "While he was scheming, I was beamin' in the beamer, just beamin', can't believe that I caught my man cheating, so I found another way to make him pay for it all" Then the other day I was watching "Waiting To Exhale". Yall know the part I'm talking about where Bernadette lays flame to all ol' boys belongings. "It is trash." Oh and I was watching Tyler Perry's "Diary of Mad Black Woman, yall know when she start kicking his ass. It made me feel empowered, that these battered womyn were getting their full due. But does this even solve anything? If you ever committed one of these selfish acts, did it help you overcome the way you felt. Ever got back with a guy who did you wrong? How's the relationship now? Is it even realistic to get revenge? All this got me to thinking, I've always been the type to not get revenge on a dude for his devilish ways. I let karma do the talking, no matter how much I want to spend all his at "Neiman-Marcus on a shopping spree-ah". What do yall think about "busting the windows out" a dude's care when he does yall wrong? Does it seem immature to yall? Have you ever gotten revenge on a woman or man? Ever had some homeboys rough him up? Steal some of his shit? What? Share! Ever really wanted to fuck him up but decided against it? Tell me your intricate plans to get back at him! Did you have to deal with any repercussions ? Did he/she find out that it was you? Did you even try to hide the fact that it was you? As the proud owner of a "Fuk that Nigga" playlist, I know listening to some music about ladies getting their revenge and getting over heartbreak helps me get over a heartbreak myself? What do yall do to get over someone stepping on your heart like a cockroach? What songs do you listen to, to help you get through the tough times, whether it be dealing with a man, friend, or family member? Please leave your thoughts in the comments section. I'll leave some songs from my playlist below.

Alicia Keys-Karma

(and how you need ya space and give the keys back to ya door)

Beyonce-Irreplaceable

(and keep talking that mess, that's fine. ps. i had some shorts like hers, that i miss soo much!)

Beyonce-Me, Myself, and I

(notice the keying of the car)

Beyonce-Ring The Alarm

(but i'll be damned if i see another chick on your arm)

Beyonce-Kitty Kat

(and you actin' like its allathat)

Beyonce-If I Were I Boy

(when you lose the one you wanted, cuz he's taking you for granted. ps, the black guy in the video can get it!)

Beyonce-Single Ladies(Put A Ring On It)

(if you like it, then you should've put a ring on it)

Ok, that was a lot of Bey but I love me some her.

Erykah Badu-Tyrone

(i'm getting tideofyoshit)

Jazmine Sullivan-Bust Your Windows

(you see you can't just play with people's feelings)

Kelis-Caught Out There

(held you when you were sick....)

Rihanna-Take A Bow

(that was quite a show, very entertaining, but its over now)

Keyshia Cole- I Should've Cheated

(i miss this keyshia!)

Keyshia Cole-Should've Let You Go

(in my heart i know, ya couldn't love me, but maybe i just kept holding on)

Keyshia Cole-I Remember

(thinking of all the times we shared)

Keyshia Cole-Let It Go

(let it go)

Keyshia Cole-I Just Want It To Be Over

(why you don't care no more)

Ok, that was a lot of Keyshia, but yall know she used to be on the heartbreak tip!

Mariah Carey-Shake It Off

(love this video!)

Destiny's Child-Independent Woman

(when its all over please get up and leave)

Ciara-Like A Boy

(oooh Reggie Bush!)

Christina Aguilera-Fighter

(After all you put me through, You'd think I'd despise you, But in the end I wanna thank you, 'Cause you made me that much stronger)

Blu Cantrell-Hit Em Up Style(Oops!)

Mary J. Blige-Not Gon Cry

(while all the time I was loving you, you were busy loving yourself)

Cherish-Unappreciated

(don't sleep on cherish)

Mary J. Blige-Your Child

(cuz i'm believing what yo friends say bout your hidden secreies)

Mary J. Blige-Enough Cryin'

(don't wanna play house no more)

Mary J. Blige-It's A Wrap

(what you were saying in your sleep, it violated me)