We were all shocked, to see that it happened and to see that Chris was actually capable of something like that. We saw both of them as good kids, thanks to their image.
So something that you may not have heard about the situation is that the NCFM (National Coalition for Men) have released a statement, it is a plea urging Rihanna to come forward about abuse Chris has suffered at her hands.
I get involved and talk about celebrity affairs, because, number one, I have a interest in the celebrity. However, I also believe that it is good to learn from the mistakes of others, and I think we can all agree celebrities make some of the BIGGEST mistakes known to human kind. I think we can make good come from a bad situation. At the very least, we can use this situation as a catalyst to start the conversation about domestic violence, women's role in it, and especially how these subjects look in the Black American community.
I think its important to look at the response to this situation and see how it relates to how we deal with violence as Black Americans. I have never heard such severe responses to a abuse victim as I have heard towards Rihanna. I think its also important to see how we define abuse and violence, how some of us make excuses for this behavior and blame the victim, and how we measure the importance of the particular amount of violence faced. We have to admit that this issue goes beyond just Rihanna and Chris Brown and we need to see what the background to the situation is. These are two, young black celebrities with a lot of power and yet, very minimal power. Both parties have previously stated that their mothers suffered abuse while they were married. Then we have a sexual aspect, where we have a constant barrage of black women defending Chris, perhaps because they see him as a sex symbol, and still having a chance with him, sexually. Perhaps we and the media alike, have framed the issue as having two opposing sides, instead of each person involved needing help for emotional issues. Rihanna is also seen as the enemy, not just Chris. How awful it must be to go through an example of domestic violence then to have people who should defend you, make bad comments about you and the situation.
I do believe, that in order to get a clear view of ANY situation of domestic violence, there needs to be a clear conversation between both parties and a mediator to what happened. If Rihanna also took the role of an abuser in the relationship or even on that night, she needs to admit that to herself and who ever she is working with emotionally. Each case of abuse is different, however, we do get a one-sided view of domestic violence: man hits woman. We know that women are agressors in abuse situations all the time, its threat of violence, and a stigma that emasculizes men when they come forward about abuse. If Rihanna were to come out about her abuse, it could add to that conversation. It is not ok to hit ANYONE, whether you are a man or woman hitting a man or woman. We need to start to respect a person's body and work out our emotions in other ways besides violence.